quiet

I'm quiet today. It's spreading to my heart. Life isn't always easy. Not that it's really hard right now. It's just quiet.

I don't want to say that I'm looking for trouble. I just have had so much going on in my life for so long, that these empty days are geniunely boring. It's a simple life here in Gainesville. For me.

Being new in real life kinda brings to light how much I don't share here.

That may sound strange, but for the last 15 years or so, the people around me have watched my life change and grow and, well, they've been there. So, there's not much back story required. At least about the day to day stuff that makes up my life experiences. At least the ones that people seemed to mostly be interested in.

Since I'm new in real life, I find myself re-telling some who I am and where I came from types of stories.

I think I've been using my kids to make friends.

I say this because when I think about knowing people in Washington, I think about the being known that goes about as deep as 'how was your day?' and 'what's been going on with you lately'. I've habitually answered those questions with answers that tend to lean heavily on the kids. People seem to like me, but I've long believed that if they really knew me, they'd change their minds. They'd realize that they probably, more than anything, pity my kids for having the mom they're stuck with.

That said, I realize that y'all don't know a dang thing about each of my children except for the day to day stuff that I do share...which I know isn't much. There have been many times that I've wanted to reference something specifically about one of them, but y'all don't know that there's some other historical stuff that directly relates to why what recently has been encountered has relevance.

So, I don't share any of it.

Would it be weird to spend a bit of time going back in history and letting out some history on each of my kids?

Part of the reason that I'm even thinking about doing this is because the other day when I was googling something, I realized I've lived a lot of life and that since I have a blog I could actually, possibly be a resource for someone who was googling something that I have talked about. But since there's no backstory here, I don't share anything that anyone would probably even dream of finding useful.