So, I mentioned in a previous post that I was considering moving. Well, I did it. About 3 weeks ago, to be specific. We're all moved in and enjoying quite a nice change to the normal, chaotic lives we'd become sort of accustomed to. Ya know something? I feel like I'm actually embracing the real grown up in me.
1. There was only one night with laundry on the couch. After folding those loads, I decided that if my mom could grow me up my whole life without laundry on the couch, I could probably also fold my laundry as it comes out of the dryer and just be done with it. I've made a new expectation of the children where they are responsible to put away their laundry as soon as it's folded, in the drawers where they belong. It's working AMAZINGLY!!!
2. Both boys are getting to school on time, every day, and from the school drop off, I've been heading straight into the office. That means that I've been waking up with them AND getting ready for the day!!
3. I battled with the school district over transportation and I WON!!!! It did take the entirety of 3 weeks and a rant. Go me!!!
So, we're all getting used to the new address. I'm switching up some other things and might actually get a Florida drivers license. Maybe.
Me. A grown up. Strange...
Showing posts with label getting to know me. Show all posts
Showing posts with label getting to know me. Show all posts
Friday, March 20, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Ya know what? That's what!
I've hit a bit of a stopping point in the rush that has been the months since the beginning of the year. Busy has been the order of every day.
I've spent some time in the last few days doing some self-examination. Maybe bullets would be best for the next section.
I do!! I do love them!!! Hooray for me!! The pressure's off!!!
Now, if I can only make a habit of THAT line of thinking...
I've spent some time in the last few days doing some self-examination. Maybe bullets would be best for the next section.
- I am a very capable person.
- I think I can do more than the average person in a day.
- I am often convinced that my value is completely based on what I can accomplish.
- I despise lists.
- Once I feel the beginnings of wasted time in my life, I find myself making lists of what I've done so that I can give myself credit for feeling tired or busy or wasteful of time.
- Then I begin to despise myself for making the above mentioned list.
- Then I think, "Why are you so compelled, self, to get credit. Just get stuff done."
- Then I think, "Dude?! I am getting stuff done! Check out the list!?!"
- Then I think, "What's up with you thinking that your value is based solely on what you accomplish and get credit for?"
Well, I think you probably get the picture. I get knotted up having expectations for people that they simply cannot meet. Not due to any short coming on their part, but because I am downright, unreal. I don't know how to effectively just be okay with myself for what I do nor do I know how to be okay if there I things I'm not awesome at getting done.
So, this last couple of days, I've been working hard on getting out of the self-centered cycle and onto the reality that I'm a decent enough person. I work hard. Other people work hard. They sleep with a clear conscience and so. can. I. I'm not, in fact, valued because of what I can get done, at least not by the measurers that count (people that I love and that love me) in the long run. All they care about is if I love them.I do!! I do love them!!! Hooray for me!! The pressure's off!!!
Now, if I can only make a habit of THAT line of thinking...
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
I just feel like I should write
The other day, I had the awesome pleasure of talking to my mom on my drive home from work. We talked about all sorts of things, but one thing really stuck out to me. I feel that it's important enough that I go ahead and process through some of it here, where processing feelings seems to have fallen by the wayside.
She and I were talking about grief. About how difficult it still is for her to make it through periods of time since Michelle died. Sometimes, the sadness envelopes her and removes her ability to sleep, or eat, or want to just do normal things. She talked about how sometimes the sadness just swims in her head and she finds it difficult to stop thinking all sorts of things.
I was reminded of myself when she was talking. I remembered when I started this blog how I'd write and write about my sadness. I would type and think and process and cry and just get out a bunch of feelings. I told her about how writing, here, really helped me with getting out some of my feelings and moving through my grief. I told her that even though sometimes it was so hard to write, I would force myself to. I told her that those times would get out some of the truest, heart soothing thoughts. The hardest posts to write were the most healing by far.
It's been a really long time since I've just sat here and vented out feelings. When I was talking to her, I really felt whole and settled in my heart. Healed.
There are certainly lots of moments in my days that don't feel like that at all. Lots of days in my weeks that barely resemble the way I felt that night on the phone with my mom. I go through these days thinking that I've got things together, but then sometimes, out of nowhere, something is said and it hits me just right (or wrong), on a day where there's very little of me left and I realize that I'm probably not as healed up and healthy as I'd like to be.
When I spend the better part of the evening crying because I can't sort out where the anger really stems from, I'm pretty sure that I should write. Because there I'll be, sitting there, swimming in a mess of thoughts, and what do I do? Avoid. Disconnect. Grow more angry at myself for all of the things that ... Sleep.
I need to write. That's what I need to do.
She and I were talking about grief. About how difficult it still is for her to make it through periods of time since Michelle died. Sometimes, the sadness envelopes her and removes her ability to sleep, or eat, or want to just do normal things. She talked about how sometimes the sadness just swims in her head and she finds it difficult to stop thinking all sorts of things.
I was reminded of myself when she was talking. I remembered when I started this blog how I'd write and write about my sadness. I would type and think and process and cry and just get out a bunch of feelings. I told her about how writing, here, really helped me with getting out some of my feelings and moving through my grief. I told her that even though sometimes it was so hard to write, I would force myself to. I told her that those times would get out some of the truest, heart soothing thoughts. The hardest posts to write were the most healing by far.
It's been a really long time since I've just sat here and vented out feelings. When I was talking to her, I really felt whole and settled in my heart. Healed.
There are certainly lots of moments in my days that don't feel like that at all. Lots of days in my weeks that barely resemble the way I felt that night on the phone with my mom. I go through these days thinking that I've got things together, but then sometimes, out of nowhere, something is said and it hits me just right (or wrong), on a day where there's very little of me left and I realize that I'm probably not as healed up and healthy as I'd like to be.
When I spend the better part of the evening crying because I can't sort out where the anger really stems from, I'm pretty sure that I should write. Because there I'll be, sitting there, swimming in a mess of thoughts, and what do I do? Avoid. Disconnect. Grow more angry at myself for all of the things that ... Sleep.
I need to write. That's what I need to do.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
A New Year...
It's another new year. I rang it in in the usual way. Much rest was certainly required on the 1st. I had an awesome day of resting on the couch with my girlie. The boys enjoyed the sunshine outside and rode bikes. It was an awesome day.
But there was change a'brewing...something in the air.
Several months ago, I took some pictures. I called them the befores. Today, I should be able to present the afters with very little effort. You see, in an effort to downsize and react marginally to the economic changes in our family's life, I've found a new place to live. It's an apartment just down the road a bit. A little closer into town. A lot less a month.
The only downside is that our current home needs to sublease out the remainder of my contract. I talked to my landlord and he was very understanding. He's listed the house on the website where we found it and there was to be a showing this morning.
Sweetie worked her butt off yesterday and I came home from the office and pitched right in. Not only can I now park a car in the garage, the laundry's nearly done. All the bedrooms are clean. I can't imagine that I'm about to admit to this, but with a couple of groceries in the house, I just might qualify myself as an actual, real-life grown up.
Weird. Me. A Grown Up. In Real Life!
But there was change a'brewing...something in the air.
Several months ago, I took some pictures. I called them the befores. Today, I should be able to present the afters with very little effort. You see, in an effort to downsize and react marginally to the economic changes in our family's life, I've found a new place to live. It's an apartment just down the road a bit. A little closer into town. A lot less a month.
The only downside is that our current home needs to sublease out the remainder of my contract. I talked to my landlord and he was very understanding. He's listed the house on the website where we found it and there was to be a showing this morning.
Sweetie worked her butt off yesterday and I came home from the office and pitched right in. Not only can I now park a car in the garage, the laundry's nearly done. All the bedrooms are clean. I can't imagine that I'm about to admit to this, but with a couple of groceries in the house, I just might qualify myself as an actual, real-life grown up.
Weird. Me. A Grown Up. In Real Life!
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Vernacular
Main Entry:
ver·nac·u·lar
Function:
adjective
Etymology:
Latin vernaculus native, from verna slave born in the master's house, native
Date:
1601
1 a: using a language or dialect native to a region or country rather than a literary, cultured, or foreign language b: of, relating to, or being a nonstandard language or dialect of a place, region, or country c: of, relating to, or being the normal spoken form of a language2: applied to a plant or animal in the common native speech as distinguished from the Latin nomenclature of scientific classification3: of, relating to, or characteristic of a period, place, or group ; especially : of, relating to, or being the common building style of a period or place
— ver·nac·u·lar·ly adverb
Just in case you weren't sure, I'm apparently a bit of a Yankee. I find myself living in the south these days and I'm rather enjoying it, as I've said before. Though, it does appear that there are some words that I use that are just a little silly to these southerners. Things like sliver (splinter) and pop (soda). Apparently, crayons has 2 syllables and caramel has 3. I'm learning more and more of this southern tongue, but I'll probably always have more oatmeal in my pantry than grits.
All that said, I'd like to reveal the results of this fancy little quiz, just to prove that I'm quite possibly capable of playing for both teams!
Moreover, I blame the midwest! ;-)
ver·nac·u·lar
Function:
adjective
Etymology:
Latin vernaculus native, from verna slave born in the master's house, native
Date:
1601
1 a: using a language or dialect native to a region or country rather than a literary, cultured, or foreign language b: of, relating to, or being a nonstandard language or dialect of a place, region, or country c: of, relating to, or being the normal spoken form of a language2: applied to a plant or animal in the common native speech as distinguished from the Latin nomenclature of scientific classification
— ver·nac·u·lar·ly adverb
Just in case you weren't sure, I'm apparently a bit of a Yankee. I find myself living in the south these days and I'm rather enjoying it, as I've said before. Though, it does appear that there are some words that I use that are just a little silly to these southerners. Things like sliver (splinter) and pop (soda). Apparently, crayons has 2 syllables and caramel has 3. I'm learning more and more of this southern tongue, but I'll probably always have more oatmeal in my pantry than grits.
All that said, I'd like to reveal the results of this fancy little quiz, just to prove that I'm quite possibly capable of playing for both teams!
You Are 50% Yankee, 50% Dixie |
 You're a pretty even split of Yankee and Dixie. You've probably traveled around a lot in your life. |
Moreover, I blame the midwest! ;-)
Your Linguistic Profile: |
 55% General American English 20% Upper Midwestern 10% Yankee 5% Dixie 5% Midwestern |
Sunday, October 26, 2008
I've found a new love and I'm not ashamed to admit it!
I think if you've known me for about a day, you have probably figured out that I have got me some really dry feet. My heels are almost always cracked and I've tried everything to make it better.
Seriously? Everything.
Been there. Done that.
Then about a year ago, this fancy little product came on TV and I was all about the commercials. This drew significant ribbing from my family since they KNOW how much I've struggled with the dry heels. The commercial always showed this really gross ending to the fantastic smooth heels that loomed so closely. This ending requires the user to throw away the shavings.
Can I just tell you? I've had my share of pedicures and I've shaved my heels with enough devices that the thought of something catching all the sluff instead of me having to sweep up after the event? Well, that's nearly benefit enough AND reward enough for me to endure the teasing I knew would happen if I went ahead and tried this little device. 
Alright ladies and gentleman, I did it. I braved the ribbing. I broke down. I picked the pink one in honor of Breast Cancer Awareness month. I paid the lady her ten dollars and ya know what? I could be a freaking HEEL MODEL!!! Seriously? Such smoothness! The bliss is nearly uncontainable.
Thank you, Ped Egg. Thank you so very much!
Thursday, October 9, 2008
My first time...
I went on a business trip last week and I had the awesome pleasure of heading back to the place I left a little over a year ago. It was my first time back since that early morning last August, when the car was packed up and I started the 5 day journey east with the kids.
I got to stay with my parents and drive my daddy's car. My momma cooked for me and did some laundry, took in my clothes so they'd fit, and even took me shopping. It was such a privilege to be spoiled during those days in their home again. Being with my folks was absolutely the best part about the trip.
I took ^that^ picture on my last day. We went down to the waterfront in Des Moines and walked out on the fishing pier. It was a beautiful day and seeing the Sound was just what I needed after such a heavily charged, emotion filled week back home.
I find it somewhat difficult to call Seattle home, now, especially having been back. Riding home on Sunday afternoon from the airport, anticipating hugging my kids and just being home was new again and freshly exhilarating.
There have definitely been times during the last year that I wanted nothing more than to go back to Seattle. Thinking that's where my home was. I know it's rather cliche, but what I learned most about my trip "home" is that when all was said and done, I actually left home and visited a place I once lived.
I got to stay with my parents and drive my daddy's car. My momma cooked for me and did some laundry, took in my clothes so they'd fit, and even took me shopping. It was such a privilege to be spoiled during those days in their home again. Being with my folks was absolutely the best part about the trip.
I took ^that^ picture on my last day. We went down to the waterfront in Des Moines and walked out on the fishing pier. It was a beautiful day and seeing the Sound was just what I needed after such a heavily charged, emotion filled week back home.
I find it somewhat difficult to call Seattle home, now, especially having been back. Riding home on Sunday afternoon from the airport, anticipating hugging my kids and just being home was new again and freshly exhilarating.
There have definitely been times during the last year that I wanted nothing more than to go back to Seattle. Thinking that's where my home was. I know it's rather cliche, but what I learned most about my trip "home" is that when all was said and done, I actually left home and visited a place I once lived.
Saturday, May 3, 2008
A little self reveal
This is the post where I tell you about the crazy places I live in.
These places are all in my mind (thus the URL).
I really do live on a tenuous string of sanity. I manage pretty well from day to day with the ever present help of my chemical romance, Zoloft. I joke heartily of the need for meds each day, but the reality is that I require medication to function. This reality breaks me sometimes. I absolutely hate the meds. HATE...HATE. HATE!
The saneness you think you see in me, where you think I'm as normal as you, is 100% due to my medication.
My need for medication really pisses me off.
I've been consulted by people about the whole "should I take meds" thing and my response is always the same. "Taking medication to affect change in the chemical imbalances in the brain that cause functional changes is the same thing as a diabetic person who takes insulin. It's nothing to fight. It's just a necessary thing!"
Funny, that when the rubber met the road for me recently, I found myself complaining about how AWFUL it is that I have to take STUPID medication just so I can get up in the morning and even then barely think straight to someone. I confided my hatred for my meds with a new friend of mine. This friend has type I diabetes and has been on insulin since the age of 12. I was quickly informed by this friend that I was talking to the wrong person about not liking the reality that I require a chemical to sustain normalcy. The reality that I can even take meds, when someone like my Middle Mann has no choice but to endure life as it rolls toward him, should comfort me more than piss me off.
Lately, I'm not convinced that Zoloft will be my life long friend. Or least not the at dosage that I'm curently on.
My world has been rocked recently. The rocking action that knocked me down from my string of sanity is really just a little thing. Just a simple email, probably sent with the best of intentions, but an email that rocked me nonetheless.
I try to learn from everything. A situation. A circumstance. A relationship. A song. Right now, I'm learning not to hate the meds, and I'm learning how to better prepare for the unforeseen mental side swipe that can strike from nowhere.
These places are all in my mind (thus the URL).
I really do live on a tenuous string of sanity. I manage pretty well from day to day with the ever present help of my chemical romance, Zoloft. I joke heartily of the need for meds each day, but the reality is that I require medication to function. This reality breaks me sometimes. I absolutely hate the meds. HATE...HATE. HATE!
The saneness you think you see in me, where you think I'm as normal as you, is 100% due to my medication.
My need for medication really pisses me off.
I've been consulted by people about the whole "should I take meds" thing and my response is always the same. "Taking medication to affect change in the chemical imbalances in the brain that cause functional changes is the same thing as a diabetic person who takes insulin. It's nothing to fight. It's just a necessary thing!"
Funny, that when the rubber met the road for me recently, I found myself complaining about how AWFUL it is that I have to take STUPID medication just so I can get up in the morning and even then barely think straight to someone. I confided my hatred for my meds with a new friend of mine. This friend has type I diabetes and has been on insulin since the age of 12. I was quickly informed by this friend that I was talking to the wrong person about not liking the reality that I require a chemical to sustain normalcy. The reality that I can even take meds, when someone like my Middle Mann has no choice but to endure life as it rolls toward him, should comfort me more than piss me off.
Lately, I'm not convinced that Zoloft will be my life long friend. Or least not the at dosage that I'm curently on.
My world has been rocked recently. The rocking action that knocked me down from my string of sanity is really just a little thing. Just a simple email, probably sent with the best of intentions, but an email that rocked me nonetheless.
I try to learn from everything. A situation. A circumstance. A relationship. A song. Right now, I'm learning not to hate the meds, and I'm learning how to better prepare for the unforeseen mental side swipe that can strike from nowhere.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Traveling
So my cool new job...can I tell you something?
Traveling is my favorite part!
It's kinda strange how the mundane everyday life stuff can get almost unbearable, but then you get on an airplane and you end up in a different place. A place that's clean. To a client who is going to end up with more when you leave then they have when you get there. A place that lets you...hmm...be. The pressure is completely work related and the living that happens outside of the work stuff is just what you make it.
I remembered this week while I was in St Louis how much fun my heart likes to have. It reminded me of this amidst a very upset stomach and a raging panic attack in the middle of training on Wednesday, but a felt completely alive in a whole new way. A way that wasn't actually all that new.
Softie is worried that I'm going to dive into the deep end of crazy, but honestly...it's been so long since I've felt this alive and this happy inside. Really. Really. Happy inside.
so of course, because I don't know exactly how to be happy? I feel completely crazy! Out of My MIND CRAZY!!!!
And that is your free bit of information about me today. You're welcome.
Traveling is my favorite part!
It's kinda strange how the mundane everyday life stuff can get almost unbearable, but then you get on an airplane and you end up in a different place. A place that's clean. To a client who is going to end up with more when you leave then they have when you get there. A place that lets you...hmm...be. The pressure is completely work related and the living that happens outside of the work stuff is just what you make it.
I remembered this week while I was in St Louis how much fun my heart likes to have. It reminded me of this amidst a very upset stomach and a raging panic attack in the middle of training on Wednesday, but a felt completely alive in a whole new way. A way that wasn't actually all that new.
Softie is worried that I'm going to dive into the deep end of crazy, but honestly...it's been so long since I've felt this alive and this happy inside. Really. Really. Happy inside.
so of course, because I don't know exactly how to be happy? I feel completely crazy! Out of My MIND CRAZY!!!!
And that is your free bit of information about me today. You're welcome.
many many things
I've been quiet. Not just here. Except that in real life I actually have to keep talking and living. On the blog, I can just sort of cop out with an occasional picture or video and call it good.
I've had lots of things going on lately. Lots and lots of crazy pounding around inside of me. Some of it showing. I think I'll write a little bit about it, but I also think I might just drop some little antidotes about my life and stuff.
I sort of feel like I've kinda been having a little bit of a blog identity crisis. My heart has had a hard time being all transparent. I guess I sort of figure that if I don't write I won't be able to look back and see where I've come from in a few years or maybe even in a few days. Sometimes, it might only take a couple of hours.
I've had lots of things going on lately. Lots and lots of crazy pounding around inside of me. Some of it showing. I think I'll write a little bit about it, but I also think I might just drop some little antidotes about my life and stuff.
I sort of feel like I've kinda been having a little bit of a blog identity crisis. My heart has had a hard time being all transparent. I guess I sort of figure that if I don't write I won't be able to look back and see where I've come from in a few years or maybe even in a few days. Sometimes, it might only take a couple of hours.
sometimes, a new perspective is all that I need.
Brought to you by UrbanDictionary.com
Beth
1. beth
gem like, shim-shimmering like a precious stone, awe-inspiring and captivating.
adjec; to bling, or razzle dazzle.
"the escalade was completely beth'd out on 22" spin-teks"
Beth
1. beth
gem like, shim-shimmering like a precious stone, awe-inspiring and captivating.
adjec; to bling, or razzle dazzle.
"the escalade was completely beth'd out on 22" spin-teks"
Sunday, December 9, 2007
a couple of things I've been thinking about lately.
I went on vacation a few years ago. Actually, it was before I even met Softie. It was actually before Middle Mann was one year old. He's 13 now.
Anyway, I went to visit my best friend from high school and we stayed with her family for 3 weeks. It was a ton of fun. Her mom worked at a school for special kids as the director for the aquatics program there. There's a lot about my friend's mom that I really thought very highly of. Much of my parenting process is based in large part on the kind of mom I observed her to be. She trusted her kids and she let them negotiate and explain why they wanted what they wanted. I had never seen anything like that in the past, and it really made sense to me.
Anyway, sometime during my stay there, she mentioned that she didn't use shaving cream when she shaved her legs. She just shaved 'em. My skin was never soft enough to do that. I was born with dry skin and I didn't think there was much chance of my skin ever really being soft.
Then, a different friend, just a couple of years ago, gave me the gift of a lifetime. She introduced me to Cetaphil. While this might not seem all that important to the average person, but to me? It was the nectar my skin had been longing for for all of my life. That might sound like an exaggeration, but really? it's not.
Ever since I started using Cetaphil, my skin is all soft and wonderful! and as a result during the last couple of years, I've been able to start shaving without shaving cream. It's really small, but I think it's an amazing time saver, and it reminds me everyday of the way that two completely separate relationships intersected at my life.
AND MOST RANDOM OF ALL!?! Tomorrow, I'm getting on a plane and I'm gonna go see my friend. The one from high school. It's been several years since we've seen each other, and I'm really excited about it. Wait, I'm getting on a plane for work. As a bonus, I'm going to be able to see my friend. I might even get to see her mom too.
Anyway, I went to visit my best friend from high school and we stayed with her family for 3 weeks. It was a ton of fun. Her mom worked at a school for special kids as the director for the aquatics program there. There's a lot about my friend's mom that I really thought very highly of. Much of my parenting process is based in large part on the kind of mom I observed her to be. She trusted her kids and she let them negotiate and explain why they wanted what they wanted. I had never seen anything like that in the past, and it really made sense to me.
Anyway, sometime during my stay there, she mentioned that she didn't use shaving cream when she shaved her legs. She just shaved 'em. My skin was never soft enough to do that. I was born with dry skin and I didn't think there was much chance of my skin ever really being soft.
Then, a different friend, just a couple of years ago, gave me the gift of a lifetime. She introduced me to Cetaphil. While this might not seem all that important to the average person, but to me? It was the nectar my skin had been longing for for all of my life. That might sound like an exaggeration, but really? it's not.
Ever since I started using Cetaphil, my skin is all soft and wonderful! and as a result during the last couple of years, I've been able to start shaving without shaving cream. It's really small, but I think it's an amazing time saver, and it reminds me everyday of the way that two completely separate relationships intersected at my life.
AND MOST RANDOM OF ALL!?! Tomorrow, I'm getting on a plane and I'm gonna go see my friend. The one from high school. It's been several years since we've seen each other, and I'm really excited about it. Wait, I'm getting on a plane for work. As a bonus, I'm going to be able to see my friend. I might even get to see her mom too.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Does it own the crazy or share the crazy?
I've wondered recently a little bit about my online 'name'.
Everyone's Crazy
That's me. But what does that really mean?
It all boils down to the apostrophe. Where is the ownership?
I tend to think that I am everyone's crazy friend. I also believe that everyone is a little crazy. When things are boiled down to the barest of who we all are, I think we're all a little crazy. Somewhere, deep down inside of the places we all try to hide, there is crazy.
Embrace it! Own it! Don't let it own you!
Everyone's Crazy
That's me. But what does that really mean?
It all boils down to the apostrophe. Where is the ownership?
I tend to think that I am everyone's crazy friend. I also believe that everyone is a little crazy. When things are boiled down to the barest of who we all are, I think we're all a little crazy. Somewhere, deep down inside of the places we all try to hide, there is crazy.
Embrace it! Own it! Don't let it own you!
Saturday, November 3, 2007
those crazy Bible characters
I've been thinking in the silly quiet parts of my head about the Bible. I've been wondering about some of the heros from the Old and New Testaments and the kinds of people that God chose to use for His kingdom. I've been thinking about this is relation to my own retrospective look at myself.
Don't get me wrong here. I don't think I'm like one of the people in the Bible. Noah, Abraham, Moses, David, Elijah, the 12 disciples, or Paul. What I think is an interesting thought process to consider is how they felt inside themselves comparatively to how I feel inside about myself.
As best as I can tell, they were averageish people. Just going along through their lives. Livin'. When all of a sudden. Seemingly from nowhere, this great big God took ahold of their lives and made them into what He wanted them to be. All that He did in their lives was ultimately to bring glory to Himself.
We are shown a series of snapshots of their lives. We don't know the details about the parts of their lives that aren't written. What they thought about in their alone times. What kinds of parents they were. How marriages of that day compare to today and what kind of real life partners they were. Certainly, there is no shortage of downfalls among the greats of the Bible, but all in all, what does that do to the story except bring even more glory to God?
For me, the humanness of the heros of the Bible gives me hope. It also makes me wonder what my life would look like all written down. I suppose that the story would certainly depend on who was writing it. I wonder what God would write about me.
Don't get me wrong here. I don't think I'm like one of the people in the Bible. Noah, Abraham, Moses, David, Elijah, the 12 disciples, or Paul. What I think is an interesting thought process to consider is how they felt inside themselves comparatively to how I feel inside about myself.
As best as I can tell, they were averageish people. Just going along through their lives. Livin'. When all of a sudden. Seemingly from nowhere, this great big God took ahold of their lives and made them into what He wanted them to be. All that He did in their lives was ultimately to bring glory to Himself.
We are shown a series of snapshots of their lives. We don't know the details about the parts of their lives that aren't written. What they thought about in their alone times. What kinds of parents they were. How marriages of that day compare to today and what kind of real life partners they were. Certainly, there is no shortage of downfalls among the greats of the Bible, but all in all, what does that do to the story except bring even more glory to God?
For me, the humanness of the heros of the Bible gives me hope. It also makes me wonder what my life would look like all written down. I suppose that the story would certainly depend on who was writing it. I wonder what God would write about me.
Friday, November 2, 2007
NaBloPoMo - Part II
During the last year, I've learned a lot about myself. Today, I will try and pull out some specifics. I don't think I have enough energy left right now to link like I did yesterday. Which leads me to my first discovery of myself.
I sleep a lot! I love napping.
Softie seems to have nailed down why I sleep. He thinks it's mostly because of stress. When my craziness starts to take over, I nap. When I've had a hard day at work, I nap. When someone dies, I nap. When I get a day off work, I nap. More days than not, over the last year, I've napped at least once.
I've also learned that I do have feelings and can be thoughtful. Maybe not thoughtful in the ways the other women are thoughtful~like with remembering birthdays and other special events, buying gifts or calling just to check in, but in the ways that make friendships deep. In the listening and in the real impact I allow people to make in my life. That's news to me. I really don't tend to think of myself as considerate or thoughtful. Maybe I'm not considerate, but thoughtful - at least in my own heart I am thoughtful - mostly full of thought when I forget to share all that goes on inside my heart.
I've been able to more publicly embrace the parts of me that completely suck! To point out, out loud, that I'm not alone in seeking nominations for Mother-of-the-Year for dropping balls on my kiddos. I don't believe I've literally dropped any balls on my kids. I might have thrown a couple at them, but they were soft. What?!
Tomorrow, I'll talk about the people I've gotten to know over the last year. Each person is different and though most I've not met in real life, I feel a special connection to each of them through blogging.
I sleep a lot! I love napping.
Softie seems to have nailed down why I sleep. He thinks it's mostly because of stress. When my craziness starts to take over, I nap. When I've had a hard day at work, I nap. When someone dies, I nap. When I get a day off work, I nap. More days than not, over the last year, I've napped at least once.
I've also learned that I do have feelings and can be thoughtful. Maybe not thoughtful in the ways the other women are thoughtful~like with remembering birthdays and other special events, buying gifts or calling just to check in, but in the ways that make friendships deep. In the listening and in the real impact I allow people to make in my life. That's news to me. I really don't tend to think of myself as considerate or thoughtful. Maybe I'm not considerate, but thoughtful - at least in my own heart I am thoughtful - mostly full of thought when I forget to share all that goes on inside my heart.
I've been able to more publicly embrace the parts of me that completely suck! To point out, out loud, that I'm not alone in seeking nominations for Mother-of-the-Year for dropping balls on my kiddos. I don't believe I've literally dropped any balls on my kids. I might have thrown a couple at them, but they were soft. What?!
Tomorrow, I'll talk about the people I've gotten to know over the last year. Each person is different and though most I've not met in real life, I feel a special connection to each of them through blogging.
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