Avoiding.....again....

I have a really big project with a tight deadline (haa haa! That's punny!!)

I am putting together the video for my uncle's furneral tomorrow. I worked with a friend today to pull the requested music from cassette onto CD. I have all of the pics. I've been scanning and receiving emails all week long.

So what's my reason for not just getting to it? It's a bad excuse, but I'll tell you nonetheless. I ate too much dinner. My tummy hurts really bad! Dinner was the first real food I'd eaten all day, and apparently, my eyes were bigger than my tummy. Seriously! It HURTS! I wish I could make myself throw up, but I never learned that skill in high school. I learned a ton of crap that I wish I could rid myself of, but not the forced puking.

I'm really silly for using that excuse, because truly...I'm sitting here at the computer in a semi-reclined position (so that it won't hurt so much) typing this here post. So, I have to ask myself...what's the real reason silly woman? Would 'I didn't get my Sunday nap' work? How about "I have to leave here in a little bit anyway to go pick up my Sweet One. Why start now?'

I think I'm just really tired of people dying. I can put together a memorial video, but since when have we been reduced to a 5 minute presentation to sum up a person's life? I really feel like it's an awesome responsibility. I want to present something valuable and worthy of that which is represented. I think that pressure is pushing me away from 'finishing' the video. Seriously? to Finish a video of someone's Finished Life? That makes me feel a little sick too.

I suppose I should be getting a little more used to this responsibility. After all, it's the third one I've put together in a little over a year. I am glad that there's a definite due date. The service isn't gonna move because I'm not done. So whatever I get done is what's played. And I guess, if I didn't do it, there wouldn't be a video, so anything is better than nothing.

This is a bit more complicated because my uncle had a pertty full life before he settled down with my aunt and they had their family. So I include pics of his former wives with whom he had children or just him and the kids (as though they dropped out of the sky into his arms). AND! my family will be there, viewing my finished product. Eww...I'd rather speak in front of them about what I believe about ANYTHING than be judged by them for my reluctant creativity.

A-ha! The Sweet One has summoned me to provide her that promised ride home. Maybe I'll be too tired when I get home and I'll end up finishing on the drive into Portland. Or maybe my guilt will overwhelm me and I'll stay up all stinking night finishing it. Probably that's what I'll do. Sit here, working on the presentation listening to my husband sleep peacefully next to me. I'll let you know in the morning what ended up happening.